Tuesday, October 31, 2006
pumpkins are OVER!
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
happy birthday to you, happy
who? why gus of course.
go over and thank him for all of the insightful and intelligent posts he's put up over the last two years.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
another milblog bites the dust
The command has become aware of my little digital vent page and my chiefs no longer wish my outlet to exist as they believe it to be contrary to good will and order.
So after tonight "God can't see underwater" will no longer exist.
bummer. the young man didn't post often, but when he did, the posts were always good.
keep a low profile bud. thank you for your service, and thanks for helping keep the nuke pipeline filled with trained people
ignore the man behind the curtain
anyway, i was looking around and found the following: well, duh
Thursday, October 12, 2006
a new cult surfaces
originally limited to 1000 members, the initiation rites are so stringent that their numbers have fallen to half that in modern times.
the cult's entrance requirements are basic.
- must be hindu
- must be female
- once in, marriage and children are forbidden
- once in, only death releases the person from membership
- upon death of a member, all other members are required to fan throughout the southwest asian lands until they find a replacement
- initiation rites take a month, with the final act being the removal of the woman's nipples, to insure she will not be tempted to run away from the cult to have children, and to make her less appealing to men
the hindi name is unpronounceable to western tongues, but a direct translation of their name into english is : The Indian Nippleless 500.
sorry. but you know you will be telling that one at work tomorrow...
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
the latest from Bill
a long time. At the urging of their friends, they
decided it was finally time for marriage. Before the
wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long
conversation on how their marriage might work. They
discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.
Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to
broach the subject of their physical relationship.
"How do you feel about sex?" he asked. "Well,"she
said, responding very carefully, "I'd have to say - I
would like it infrequently." The old gentleman sat
quietly for a moment, then over his glasses, he looked
her in the eye and asked
"Is that one word or two?"
Friday, October 06, 2006
a bubblehead blogosphere roundup
first of all a snippet for you
So the label should have said in Day-Glo green letters on a phosphorescent-pink background "THIS IS A BED. USE ONLY WHILE AWAKE.Â Or perhaps ÂIF YOUR IQ IS NOT THIS TALL, YOU CANNOT RIDE ON THIS BED." Or how about an arrow pointing downward, with the legend "FALLING IN THIS DIRECTION COULD BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH. FALL ONLY UPWARD OR TO THE SIDE."hate lawyers? think shakespear had a good idea about offin' the lawyers? well, mike, an ex-bubblehead, and current lawyer, has at least one foot in that camp. check out his post that he uses as an intro to tort reform.
and our old friend the sonarman at Submarines forever has an interesting post about "safety free school zones". he actually hits on a subject near and dear to my heart: firearms. it's an interesting post, and he brings up some valid points that most americans are clueless about.
and if you are wondering what to get Myron for Christmas he left a really big hint. and honey, ME TOO! i promise i'll wash it.
and since i've sort of retired from politics for a while, i thought i'd link the knave's post about welcome to the democratic party. see, i don't need to spend all my time ranting, because there are folks out there that do a much better job of it than i do.
and cookie posts a eulogy to his old dodge truck. i know where you are coming from man. i had a 58 dodge 1/2 ton that i juiced up with a 318 canadian engine i bought from the Vallejo police department motor pool auction. it was one hell of a truck. had to finally send it off to pickup truck heaven when i couldn't get steering parts, and i was taking up two lanes going down the road.
and for you owners of newer dodge trucks, specifically Dodge Rams, please allow me to repost a picture that supposedly came from the Ford Motor Co. design headquarters:
and vigilis has a definition of Terror fuss worth looking at. he gets into some of the hype surrounding the new container radiation survey setups. Hey Vig.... you should visit mike's blog (mentioned above) since i know how much you love lawyers.
and one of my favorite objectivists and generally smart characters Gus posts about the Religion of Self Parody. smart dude. he's one of my primary sources of non-submariner/milblog links when he does his roundups.
and chap asks a question that i don't think i can answer.
and since i was going to post this link anyway in a seperate post, here's a very thoughtful and insightful movie review from Willyshakes. he looks at the movie "the Great Raid", and views it not only for the story, but for what it means to us today, 60 some years after the fact portrayed.
this willyshakes guy is another one of those really smart cookies. even if he is persuing a libral arts advanced degree. cough cough.
and last, but not least, joel blogs about more nefarious goings on with the albeque-que crew, or ex-crew. i wonder what it was about that boat that spawned these idiots?
well, there you have my roundup of the latest doings out there in submariner blogland. do you know any bubbleheads that are blogging that i haven't linked to the right? drop me an email, and i'll initiate them into the hallowed ranks of bubblebloggers.
found another bubblehead out there
first of all, go visit megamunch, and read about his competitive eating. he used to sail on the 719. then visit coot's post. it will bring back memories of that 28x72 inch coffin we used to call the skid, the kip, the rack, the bunk, and of course, bed.
megamunch reminds me of a dude i sailed with on the 575. he was an ELT like me, and not much bigger than 5'6" tall, and maybe 135 or 140 pounds tops.
one of the most amazing things i've ever seen happened on a halfway night, when the crew had a pie eating contest in crews mess.
hannan ate a huge dinner right before the contest, just to make sure he could eat. then he beat the competition by about 2 pies. seriously, two pies. and after it was all over, he had a bowl of soft-serve ice cream just to wash the pies down.
that boy could eat.
wild bill's on a roll, and i'm passing it on to YOU!
here are a couple of wild bill's jokes for today.
this is so much more pleasant than ranting about politics.
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human Beings are the only animals that stutter," she says.
A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered", she volunteered.
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
"Well", she began, "I was in my back yard with my kitty cat and the Rottweiler who lives next door and hates cats got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!
"That must've been scary," said the teacher.
"It sure was," said the little girl. "My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... and before he could say "Fuck," the Rottweiler ate him!"
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.
The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.
"Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me," she told him.
"Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," the man replied, still in pain, in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together in his groin.
But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side; she loosened his pants, and put her hands inside. She began to massage him. She then asked, "How does that feel?"
He replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."