Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Life's tough, it's even tougher if you're stupid
First-year students at the UC Davis Vet school were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow.
They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, 'In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body.' For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth.
'Go ahead and do the same thing,' he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the anal opening of the dead cow and sucking on it.
When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and said, 'The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger.' 'Now learn to pay attention. Life's tough, it's even tougher if you're stupid.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
i've bought a few from their competitors
Friday, February 13, 2009
you just can't make this stuff up
An investigation has been launched after a man convicted of possessing cannabis was fitted with a tracking device attached to his false leg.
Bret Ravenhill, who lost his limb in a motorbike accident in 2003, said a security worker failed to spot his left leg was made of metal and detachable when they attached the tag.
yup, this is what happens when you have someone that isn't getting paid a lot doing a job for someone that is. this is what happens when you do a job that you really could give a crap about. yup, this is what happens in a society that relies more on technology than common sense.
read the whole article at The Mail
oh yeah, and another thing. this i heard on the tube last night. how can you trust a government to run an efficient stimulus package or national health care when they can't even get a bunch american's prepared for the coming digital tv transition. it was supposed to happen on 17FEB09, but because of bungling and mismanagement they've shifted the trasition back until June. after what, a couple of years preparing the public for this move? puh---leeeeese.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
the "Fairness Doctrine": even some Dems see the irony
Speaking of talk radio (which I listen to constantly), I remain incredulous that any Democrat who professes liberal values would give a moment's thought to supporting a return of the Fairness Doctrine to muzzle conservative shows. (My latest manifesto on this subject appeared in my last column.) The failure of liberals to master the vibrant medium of talk radio remains puzzling. To reach the radio audience (whether the topic is sports, politics or car repair), a host must have populist instincts and use the robust common voice. Too many Democrats have become arrogant elitists, speaking down in snide, condescending tones toward tradition-minded middle Americans whom they stereotype as rubes and buffoons. But the bottom line is that government surveillance of the ideological content of talk radio is a shocking first step toward totalitarianism.
One of the nuggets I've gleaned from several radio sources is that Michigan Sen. Debbie Stabenow, who has been in the aggressive forefront of the campaign to reinstate the Fairness Doctrine, is married to Tom Athans, who works extensively with left-wing radio organizations and was once the executive vice-president of Air America, the liberal radio syndicate that, despite massive publicity from major media, has failed miserably to win a national audience. Stabenow's outrageous conflict of interest has of course been largely ignored by the prestige press, which should have been demanding that she recuse herself from all political involvement with this issue.
who else but my favorite dem pundit/writer/journo Camille Paglia. as always, go read this weeks column. it'll do you good. see, i can and do read stuff from other than the "mindless mouth breathing far right" as one acquaintance told me during a political discussion.
Monday, February 09, 2009
today's email joke: Gynecologist to Mechanic
He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could.
When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.
When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying: "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade."
The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. "You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark."
After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career.