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Day By Day© by Chris Muir.


Wednesday, December 21, 2005

what the hell is this doing in court?

i'm sure that you have heard by now that some wackjob woman in new mexico petitioned and ACTUALLY RECEIVED an injunction against david letterman. his crime?
Nestler's application for a restraining order was accompanied by a six-page typed letter in which she said Letterman used code words, gestures and "eye expressions" to convey his desires for her.

She wrote that she began sending Letterman "thoughts of love" after his show began in 1993, and that he responded in code words and gestures, asking her to come East.

She said he asked her to be his wife during a televised "teaser" for his show by saying, "Marry me, Oprah." Her letter said Oprah was the first of many code names for her, and that the coded vocabulary increased and changed with time.

so let me get this right. i can get an injunction against someone because they have been sending me secret signals using code words, gestures, and the like? and i can get a judge to approve this thing?
well. in that case, i'm going to file for an injunction against Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid. why? because they are sending secret signals, and a lot of overt ones too, telling me that my values and beliefs are wrong. they want me to feel remorse over the fact that the economy is enjoying its 10th quarter of growth, and that i have benefited from that growth. they want me to hate the government, and are constantly sending signals that our government is a corrupt, meglomaniacal entity that can't be trusted. wait, only the part of the government they aren't involved in. that's ok, it's everything else that's bad. they want me to feel guilty that the american military, with congress's blessing, freed the iraqi people, ridding the world of maddman hussein and his warped progeny. i am supposed to hate the fact that i'm an american, proud of my country and the accomplishments of the last 4 years.
yup, i want an injunction. i want them to shut the fuck up.
think i can find a judge to issue that one?
one can only dream.


Blogger bhd said...

I can't believe you haven't heard my signals. Send me springerle, I said. Now, I said. Please, I said.

Go ahead and get an injunction, fella. But wtf? I was at least polite.

12/21/05, 4:55 PM  
Anonymous Angelique said...

Judge Sanchez, I would like to get an injunction against all the spammers sending me emails. Having to delete them every day is causing ME frustration, sleep deprivation and repetitive motion injury.

I would also like an injunction against all advertisers. They tempt us to buy what we don't need and some of it even makes us fat!

What a wacky woman. Her cable company should just block CBS from her channel lineup. Then she'd be free of Dave's tormenting.

I say the rest of us tune in to Dave's show and send the ratings through the roof. Of course, Dave couldn't dare thank the lady from NM, even if it DID make her mad that she wasn't getting any credit for his increased viewership.

I agree. How did this ever get the validation it did? What the hell is this doing in court? The judge should have referred her to authorities who could help her with her mental issues.

1/1/06, 10:15 PM  

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