Friday, April 19, 2013
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Voting with our feet.
From: Sent: Tuesday, April 09, 2013 5:09 PM To: Subject: FW: 1 4 u 2 c Outdoor Channel pulls production from CO due to Gun Ban 1 4 u 2 c Outdoor Channel pulls production from CO due to Gun Ban OUTDOOR CHANNEL PULLS PRODUCTION FROM COLORADO DUE TO CO SENATE BETRAYING 2ND RIGHTS! From: Michael Bane Date: Tue, Mar 5, 2013 at 4:09 PM Subject: OUTDOOR CHANNEL Pulls Productions from Colorado To: Steve King
Dear Senator King;IT BEGINS.... PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO ALL ON YOUR ADDRESS LIST... THIS IS THE ONLY WAY TO BEAT PROGRESSIVES!! SHOW THESE SOCIALISTS THE CONSEQUENCES OF THEIR STUPIDITY.
I met you yesterday after the so-called "public hearings" on the anti-gun bills; as I mentioned, I am an Executive Producer for OUTDOOR CHANNEL. I currently have four series in production, including GUN STORIES, the top show on OC, with several additional series in development. My series focus on guns, hunting, shooting and the outdoors.
This morning I met with my three Producers, and we made the decision that if these anti-gun bills become law, we will be moving all of our production OUT of Colorado. We have already canceled a scheduled filming session for late this month. Obviously, part of this is due to our own commitment to the right to keep and bear arms, but it also reflects 3 lawyers' opinions that these laws are so poorly drafted and so designed to trap otherwise legal citizens into a crime (one of our attorneys referred to them as "flypaper laws") that it is simply too dangerous for us to film here.
I can give you chapter and verse on the legal implications if you need, but suffice to say that the first legal opinion was so scary we went out and got two others. Al three attorneys agreed.
We are relatively small potatoes in television, but our relocation of production will cost Colorado a little less than a million dollars in 2013.
Secondly, we have proudly promoted Colorado in our productions (and have been moving more and more production into the state); now we will do exactly the opposite. What does this mean for Colorado? The community of television producers is a small one. Last week I had lunch with a major network producer who was looking to locate his new reality series in Colorado. That producer is also a shooter, and the new reality series will now be based out of Phoenix. That lunch cost Colorado over a million in economic impact.
Thirdly, according to numbers I received from the National Shooting Sports Foundation (for whom I used to work) yesterday, hunting had an almost $800,000,000 impact on Colorado in 2012, driving as many as 8330 jobs. Next month I will be in Texas meeting with most of the top outdoor/hunting producers, and the Number One agenda item will be Colorado. Already, hunting organizations and statewide hunting clubs around the country are pulling out of Colorado, and we expect this trend to accelerate rapidly.
The message we will take to our viewers and listeners is that these proposed laws are so dangerous to hunters and any other person, be she a fisherman or a skier who brings a handgun into the state for self-defense, that we cannot recommend hunting, fishing or visiting Colorado. We reach millions of people, and, quite frankly, we have a credibility that Colorado government officials can no longer match. Colorado Division of Wildlife is already running ads trying to bring more out-of-state hunters to Colorado...in light of the flood of negative publicity about these proposed laws, I can assure you those ads will fail.
We estimate that as many as one-quarter to one-third of out-of-state hunters will desert Colorado in the next 18-24 months, which will quite frankly be a disaster for the hunting industry in Colorado and have a devastating effect on our western and northern communities (certainly cities like Grand Junction).
This is not a "boycott" in the traditional sense of a centralized, organized operation; rather, it is more of a grassroots decision on where shooters, hunters and other sportsmen are willing to spend their money. Look at the collapse of the Eastern Sports and Outdoor Show in February. That venerable multimillion dollar trade show chose to ban modern sporting rifles and standard capacity magazines, and within three weeks it collapsed as all vendors and sponsors pulled out.
Colorado is going to pay a huge price for laws that will do nothing. Thank you, sir, for your support.
OUTDOOR CHANNEL email@example.com
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Unconfirmed Short Story For Engineers...
A toothpaste factory had a problem because they sometimes shipped empty boxes, without the tube inside.
This was due to the way the production line was set up, and people with experience in designing production lines will tell you how difficult it is to have everything happen with timings so precise that every single unit coming out of it is perfect 100% of the time.
Small variations in the environment mean you must have quality assurance checks smartly distributed across the line so that customers all the way down to the supermarket don't get ticked off and buy another product instead. This being important, the CEO of the toothpaste factory got the top people in the company together and they decided to start a new project, in which they would hire an external engineering company to solve their empty boxes problem, as their engineering department was already too stretched to take on any extra effort.
The project followed the usual process: project allocated third-parties selected, and six months (and $8 million) later they had a fantastic solution — on time, on budget, high quality and everyone in the project had a great time.
They solved the problem by using high-tech precision scales that would sound a bell and flash lights whenever a toothpaste box would weigh less than it should. The line would stop, and someone had to walk over and yank the defective box out , pressing another button when done to re-start the line.
A while later, the CEO decides to have a look at the projects amazing results ! No empty boxes ever shipped out of the factory after the scales were put in place. Very few customer complaints, and they were gaining a share on the market. "That's some money well spent“ he says, before looking closely at the other statistics in the report.
It turns out, the number of defects picked up by the scales was " 0 " after three weeks of production use. It should have been picking up at least a dozen a day, so maybe there was something wrong with the report.
He filed a notice against it, and after some investigation, the engineers come back saying the report was actually correct. The scales really weren't picking up any defects, because all boxes that got to that point in the conveyor belt were good.
Puzzled, the CEO travels down to the factory, and walks up to the part of the line where the precision scales were installed. A few feet before the scale, there was a $20 desk fan, blowing the empty boxes off of the belt and into a bin. "Oh, that," says one of the workers ”one of the guys put it there cause he was tired of walking over every time the bell rang to remove the empty boxes."
This is why i always tell my engineers and students to ask the dude that will have to use the system. frequently the most low tech fix is the best......
Friday, October 14, 2011
the new knee
the new knee, a set on Flickr.
here's my new knee!
Tuesday, September 06, 2011
what a bummer
Monday, April 25, 2011
today's email humor
A young engineer was leaving the office at 5:45 p.m. when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary is not here. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young engineer. He turned on the machine, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine, "I just need one copy."
Lesson: Never, never ever assume that your boss knows what he's doing.
Labels: email humor
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
today's email humor
Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.
Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, "What the heck're ya doing, Billy Bob?"
"Good Lord, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me," says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob. "But me 'n the Ol' Lady been havin trouble lately in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor."
[Don't make me come splain this to you!]
Labels: email humor
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
today's email humor is suitable for framing
She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in the shower, she sat on the toilet. As she tried to stand up, she realized that the not-quite-dry epoxy paint had glued her to the toilet seat.
About that time, Charlie got home and realized her predicament. They both pushed and pulled without any success whatsoever. Finally, in desperation, Charlie undid the toilet seat bolts.
Lucy wrapped a sheet around herself and Charlie drove her to the hospital emergency room.
The ER Doctor got her into a position where he could study how to free her.
Lucy tried to lighten the embarrassment of it all by saying,"Well, Doctor, I'll bet you've never seen anything like this before."
The Doctor replied, "Actually, I've seen lots of them. I just never saw one mounted and framed."
Labels: email humor
Saturday, November 06, 2010
music to reload by
Step inside! Hello! We've the most amazing show. You'll enjoy it all we know. Step inside! Step Inside!
We've got thrills and shocks, supersonic fighting cocks. Leave your hammers at the box
Come Inside! Come Inside! Roll up! Roll up! Roll up!
See the show!
i'd forgotten how much i liked emerson lake and palmer...
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
bedbugs? i've got something better
worried about bed bugs in hotels? there may be other bugs (that's what we call contamination) in that bed! the headline says "Alarms over radiation from thyroid cancer patients". yeah, i knew most of the things they allude to, but did you know that there are radiation monitors at landfills? actually, i did. but how about radiation monitors in the Lincoln Tunnel, sensitive enough to trigger on a medical procedure dose administered to a person traveling at speed through the tunnel in a vehicle?
i bet there are other places too, but weren't mentioned in the article. i'm guessing airports and other mass public transportation hubs have them as well.
Monday, August 30, 2010
today's email humor
I not only got the last question wrong, but was immediately asked to leave.
The question was: "Where do women have the curliest hair?"
Apparently the correct answer is Fiji .
Labels: email humor
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
What do Pink Floyd and Dale Earnhardt have it common?
Their last big hit was The Wall.......
Thursday, August 05, 2010
today's email humor post of the day
The Pope and Nancy Pelosi are on the same stage in Yankee Stadium in front of a huge crowd.
The Pope leans towards Mrs. Pelosi and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, but will go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice!"
Pelosi replied, "I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!"
So the Pope backhanded the bitch--
AND THE CROWD ROARED & CHEERED WILDLY....
Kind of brings tears to your eyes, doesn't it
Labels: email humor